I’m sure this isn’t a popular opinion, but I don’t like books with religious over- or undertones, especially in romance novels. If I wanted to read about religious people, I’d pick up something like a Dan Brown book.
I don't have a specific things, but I do know that life is too short and my To Be Read piles are too large to waste my time on a book that I am not enjoying on some level. If I feel like I'm forcing my way through, I need to move on.... and I try to ensure my high school students know that choice reading includes the choice to DNF
So glad you're preaching the importance of the DNF to your students! When we started the RAD Reading podcast, DNF was our first episodes topic because I think it's so important for a happy reading life to know you can put a book aside and not finish what you're not liking.
One of my key messages is that if you leave my classroom thinking we should only read because a teacher tells you to, I have failed you. And DNF is a part of it. I share that I read a wide variety of genres (including romance) with no qualms and (unless the book isn't appropriate for my classroom), I share the books I love and why I walk away from books. It so matters. DNF reinforces that reading doesn't have to be hard when it doesn't need to be.
During the pandemic I found it a struggle to just read anything. I have to agree with you. I need more joy in my reading. I also need my HEA. I needed to know that after the pain and suffering, that joy and happiness will win out. Spoilers are ok.
This sounds an awful lot like The Unbearable Lightness of Being - which I had to read in college and I just couldn't. There was no joy. The title even tells you that there's no joy. It's a novel about there being no joy. Sad, dark, whatever, but let there be some hope.
And I love spoilers. I crave them. I need the hook. Unless I don't. If I'm already hooked, I avoid spoilers like the plague. Don't tell me what happens in the next Marvel movie. I'll see it when I see it and I want ZERO spoilers between now and then.
Regarding spoilers: Eek, definitely not for me! I also rarely re-read a book. It’s all about the discovery for me. I like seeing how things play out.
The Martian is an exception. Very early on, I turned to my husband (who had already read it) and said: Don’t tell me anything else, but does he survive? Yes or no. He gave me a one word response. I enjoyed the book immensely, otherwise spoiler free.
There have also been a handful of novels which I had started and quit early on, where people recommending them told me to try again and read up to a certain point, because by then I’d be hooked. I suppose those are potentially considered spoilers.
And there are the rare books when you know the ending from the beginning and the meat of the book is finding out how you get there. I’m blanking on a good example of that now, though, but they can be very fun.
I appreciate your use of the word “joyless” as opposed to “sad.” Some of my favorite books have very sad parts, but there is uplift too. One good example is Lily and the Octopus. It's literally about the death of a lonely man's dog, but there’s so much joy, too.
I’m mentally reviewing books I have not found pleasure in reading, and I think they all share a lack of joy rather than a presence of sadness. This is really changing how I think about my reading preferences.
Another factor for me is having a purpose to the sadness. Books I have not enjoyed reading are easily divided into those I could appreciate intellectually and those that felt like a waste of my energy. Joyless books I can appreciate caused me to reflect on the real world or how I think about it. I can read a couple of these a year. Unfortunately, that's not always the case. I recall finishing a very popular women’s fiction novel and thinking “What am I supposed to take from this?” There was no reason for putting my psyche through the layers of misery, betrayal, and remorse.
I agree 100%. I also don't enjoy books that preach at me. That seems to be happening more and more these days. I read to meet great characters, to learn about them and think about their lives and (most of all) to be entertained.
Yes, I feel like good books can make a point or teach you something about life without it feeling like you're being talked at. Please don't beat me over the head with a lesson I'm supposed to learn. I'm reading for story.
For me it’s frustrating people—selfish, boundary-pushing, racist/sexist/homophobic, entitled, or just cruel. So many romances are set up with the grumpy object of attraction, and I can live with grumpy, especially when the author gives us that character’s POV, but I have a hard time rooting for a relationship with an a-hole. I also struggle with protagonists who allow friends or family members to regularly take advantage of them—the boundary issue. These traits are usually obvious within the first couple chapters and there are too many good books out there for me to push through that much frustration.
Yes, I have a complicated reading relationship with the alphahole hero. If the author can sell me on the backstory and why he is that way and that it's just a front and this is the beginning of his character arc, etc., I'm in. If he's just a jerk because he's a jerk, no thanks.
Yes, I'm still learning my personal lines on the content stuff. For instance, I've read a lot of true crime and can handle a lot. The book I'll Be Gone In the Dark was one of my top reads the year it came out. But recently I tried to listen to American Predator about serial killer Israel Keyes and the descriptions (which he gives in police interviews in the book) were too much for me and I had to DNF it.
I hadn't thought of all that. I was like that with My Dark Vanessa. I am a high school teacher so no thank you on books about teachers abusing students...
I love spoilers, it frustrates my partner and kids to no end but I find I can relax and actually enjoy the story/TV Show/Film more if I know what is going to happen. I have slogged through too many books with bad/disappointing endings and I just can't invest the time and energy if it's frustrating/a waste of time. And I love what you said about sad vs joyless. I don't mind a sad book if it leaves me feeling a glimmer of hope but joyless books don't work for me. I never thought about it that way but the distinction makes so much sense!
Yes, I sometimes seek out spoilers if I'm nervous for an outcome. I'll do it with reality shows like Big Brother, lol. I need to KNOW who's going to be head of household. >.<
Mine is self loathing books. Twilight was seriously guilty of this. I have never been able to complete the series (but my kids loved it). If you hate yourself that much fix yourself improve yourself. Give me characters that have secure self confidence and I'm hooked. Story lines like that hook me every time.
I've read a lot about how we like to comfort watch/read our favorite stories largely because we already know what's going to happen so it takes a lot of the worry and anxiety out of the equation. I personally don't like specific spoilers but if I have a general idea of what's going to happen rather than how it's going to happen I don't mind. There are many people who say it's all about the execution of the story rather than the story itself!
I agree on the joyless books point. I had to unfortunately DNF A Little Life by Hanya Yanagihara even though it is a beautiful book and I loved the characters. it was just absolutely heartbreaking with no hope for a happy ending. I was buddy reading it with a friend who did ended up finishing it and she was able to tell me the ending. based on her thoughts, I'm grateful to have DNFed to save myself some hopeless thoughts so I totally understand where you're coming from! also on spoilers, I can handle them in books but not movies/tv shows, not really sure why.
When we finally sat our children down to watch Buffy/Angel, we used a watchlist because there's a definite order to them. I had seen all of both shows completely out of order and I'll just say sitting and watching them together in viewing order was a LOT of fun. Like things make SO much more sense. You don't *have* to do it that way to enjoy them, but there's a whole other level of enjoyment to be had watching them in order.
Oh, no, I'm not watching them in that order! My brain would melt. I'm watching them in the correct order but I read the blurb about each episode before I watch it. :) (I went and added a disclaimer to the post, lol. I don't want people watching episodes all willy nilly!)
I’m sure this isn’t a popular opinion, but I don’t like books with religious over- or undertones, especially in romance novels. If I wanted to read about religious people, I’d pick up something like a Dan Brown book.
Yes, I don't run across this too much, but I generally avoid romances labeled "inspirational" or "clean" for this reason.
I don't have a specific things, but I do know that life is too short and my To Be Read piles are too large to waste my time on a book that I am not enjoying on some level. If I feel like I'm forcing my way through, I need to move on.... and I try to ensure my high school students know that choice reading includes the choice to DNF
So glad you're preaching the importance of the DNF to your students! When we started the RAD Reading podcast, DNF was our first episodes topic because I think it's so important for a happy reading life to know you can put a book aside and not finish what you're not liking.
One of my key messages is that if you leave my classroom thinking we should only read because a teacher tells you to, I have failed you. And DNF is a part of it. I share that I read a wide variety of genres (including romance) with no qualms and (unless the book isn't appropriate for my classroom), I share the books I love and why I walk away from books. It so matters. DNF reinforces that reading doesn't have to be hard when it doesn't need to be.
(Stepping off my platform now.... I love my job)
I love that so much. Your students are lucky to have you! <3
During the pandemic I found it a struggle to just read anything. I have to agree with you. I need more joy in my reading. I also need my HEA. I needed to know that after the pain and suffering, that joy and happiness will win out. Spoilers are ok.
Yes, I think the pandemic has definitely affected my reading too.
This sounds an awful lot like The Unbearable Lightness of Being - which I had to read in college and I just couldn't. There was no joy. The title even tells you that there's no joy. It's a novel about there being no joy. Sad, dark, whatever, but let there be some hope.
And I love spoilers. I crave them. I need the hook. Unless I don't. If I'm already hooked, I avoid spoilers like the plague. Don't tell me what happens in the next Marvel movie. I'll see it when I see it and I want ZERO spoilers between now and then.
Yeah, I haven't read that one but I've heard it's heavy. And I love that you love spoilers!
Regarding spoilers: Eek, definitely not for me! I also rarely re-read a book. It’s all about the discovery for me. I like seeing how things play out.
The Martian is an exception. Very early on, I turned to my husband (who had already read it) and said: Don’t tell me anything else, but does he survive? Yes or no. He gave me a one word response. I enjoyed the book immensely, otherwise spoiler free.
There have also been a handful of novels which I had started and quit early on, where people recommending them told me to try again and read up to a certain point, because by then I’d be hooked. I suppose those are potentially considered spoilers.
And there are the rare books when you know the ending from the beginning and the meat of the book is finding out how you get there. I’m blanking on a good example of that now, though, but they can be very fun.
Hmm… maybe I do like spoilers…
Lol, maybe you like them in some cases then. :) I only like them in some specific cases.
I appreciate your use of the word “joyless” as opposed to “sad.” Some of my favorite books have very sad parts, but there is uplift too. One good example is Lily and the Octopus. It's literally about the death of a lonely man's dog, but there’s so much joy, too.
I’m mentally reviewing books I have not found pleasure in reading, and I think they all share a lack of joy rather than a presence of sadness. This is really changing how I think about my reading preferences.
Another factor for me is having a purpose to the sadness. Books I have not enjoyed reading are easily divided into those I could appreciate intellectually and those that felt like a waste of my energy. Joyless books I can appreciate caused me to reflect on the real world or how I think about it. I can read a couple of these a year. Unfortunately, that's not always the case. I recall finishing a very popular women’s fiction novel and thinking “What am I supposed to take from this?” There was no reason for putting my psyche through the layers of misery, betrayal, and remorse.
Yes, I agree. If there's no purpose for the sadness, then I'm extra annoyed.
I agree 100%. I also don't enjoy books that preach at me. That seems to be happening more and more these days. I read to meet great characters, to learn about them and think about their lives and (most of all) to be entertained.
Yes, I feel like good books can make a point or teach you something about life without it feeling like you're being talked at. Please don't beat me over the head with a lesson I'm supposed to learn. I'm reading for story.
For me it’s frustrating people—selfish, boundary-pushing, racist/sexist/homophobic, entitled, or just cruel. So many romances are set up with the grumpy object of attraction, and I can live with grumpy, especially when the author gives us that character’s POV, but I have a hard time rooting for a relationship with an a-hole. I also struggle with protagonists who allow friends or family members to regularly take advantage of them—the boundary issue. These traits are usually obvious within the first couple chapters and there are too many good books out there for me to push through that much frustration.
Yes, I have a complicated reading relationship with the alphahole hero. If the author can sell me on the backstory and why he is that way and that it's just a front and this is the beginning of his character arc, etc., I'm in. If he's just a jerk because he's a jerk, no thanks.
I need to find joy in a book, too.
I have problems with books with TW of abuse or rape. Brutal thrillers. I don't read thrillers anymore. Just give me the HEA.
I don't mind spoilers. Sometimes I'll check out the end, but usually I don't.
Yes, I'm still learning my personal lines on the content stuff. For instance, I've read a lot of true crime and can handle a lot. The book I'll Be Gone In the Dark was one of my top reads the year it came out. But recently I tried to listen to American Predator about serial killer Israel Keyes and the descriptions (which he gives in police interviews in the book) were too much for me and I had to DNF it.
I hadn't thought of all that. I was like that with My Dark Vanessa. I am a high school teacher so no thank you on books about teachers abusing students...
Yeah, that book was a tough read.
I love spoilers, it frustrates my partner and kids to no end but I find I can relax and actually enjoy the story/TV Show/Film more if I know what is going to happen. I have slogged through too many books with bad/disappointing endings and I just can't invest the time and energy if it's frustrating/a waste of time. And I love what you said about sad vs joyless. I don't mind a sad book if it leaves me feeling a glimmer of hope but joyless books don't work for me. I never thought about it that way but the distinction makes so much sense!
Yes, I sometimes seek out spoilers if I'm nervous for an outcome. I'll do it with reality shows like Big Brother, lol. I need to KNOW who's going to be head of household. >.<
Mine is self loathing books. Twilight was seriously guilty of this. I have never been able to complete the series (but my kids loved it). If you hate yourself that much fix yourself improve yourself. Give me characters that have secure self confidence and I'm hooked. Story lines like that hook me every time.
Ah, that's an interesting one and one that would definitely be important to know about your reading life.
I've read a lot about how we like to comfort watch/read our favorite stories largely because we already know what's going to happen so it takes a lot of the worry and anxiety out of the equation. I personally don't like specific spoilers but if I have a general idea of what's going to happen rather than how it's going to happen I don't mind. There are many people who say it's all about the execution of the story rather than the story itself!
Yes, I think that's why romance works. We don't have specific spoilers, just the big happy ending one.
I agree on the joyless books point. I had to unfortunately DNF A Little Life by Hanya Yanagihara even though it is a beautiful book and I loved the characters. it was just absolutely heartbreaking with no hope for a happy ending. I was buddy reading it with a friend who did ended up finishing it and she was able to tell me the ending. based on her thoughts, I'm grateful to have DNFed to save myself some hopeless thoughts so I totally understand where you're coming from! also on spoilers, I can handle them in books but not movies/tv shows, not really sure why.
Yes, I've heard that book really puts you through the wringer. I'll pass on that one.
Life is to short for books that are brining you joy. I have given myself permission to walk away from books as not every book will be for me!
Yes, I'm definitely pro-DNF. I've DNFed more books this year than ever because I just don't want to waste my time on something I'm not enjoying.
I love Buffy, might have to try the watchlist order (although my OCD will be screaming loudly 😁)
When we finally sat our children down to watch Buffy/Angel, we used a watchlist because there's a definite order to them. I had seen all of both shows completely out of order and I'll just say sitting and watching them together in viewing order was a LOT of fun. Like things make SO much more sense. You don't *have* to do it that way to enjoy them, but there's a whole other level of enjoyment to be had watching them in order.
Yes, there are big important season and series long character and story arcs that lose their punch if watched out of order.
Oh, no, I'm not watching them in that order! My brain would melt. I'm watching them in the correct order but I read the blurb about each episode before I watch it. :) (I went and added a disclaimer to the post, lol. I don't want people watching episodes all willy nilly!)
Ahhhhh. Ok, now I feel better. Chronological order it is!!
Ugh, the misleading happy cover is the worst. You think you're getting one thing and them bam, everybody's dead. Lol.